Trying to be 'green' lately, but not sure how to translate your efforts over to the Christmas Season? A few tips for starting new, green traditions.
1) Bring Your Bags. We are getting used to bringing our reusable bags to the grocery store, but it is just as important at the mall. When buying gifts, people will often walk out with 15 tiny bags, when all those things would have fit into one reusable bag.
2) Consider a new Tree Tradition. If you have a young child at home, consider buying a smaller (four foot or so) potted tree. Decorate as usual, but at the end of the season, stick it outside, ready to grow a bit for next year. You can buy or rent live or potted trees at many local garden centres.
3) Give Green: Consider buying eco-friendly gifts. With growing consumer interest in green products, it is easier to find green gifts for every member of the family.
4) Buy Local: From gifts, to wrapping, to food, try to buy as much as you can from locally-owned, or locally grown merchants. This cuts greenhouse gas emissions from shipping, and supports local economy and jobs.
5) Re-gift. If you get something, that you are honestly never going to use, give it to someone who will. There is no shame in giving someone something you think they will use.
6) Re-wrap. Consider buying or making some fabric gift bags, that can be used over and over again. If you receive gifts in paper gift bags, save them for next year. I will be wrapping my gift this year in the few brown paper bags I have collected from trips to the grocery store when I forgot my re-usable bags.
7) Decorate with Nature. Natural ornaments like holly, evergreen, cranberries, popcorn and fruit are all compostable, and smell great in your house! It's fun to take a trip outside or to the farm to buy these things, and then create beautiful wreaths, garlands and centerpieces.
8) Give Giving. Many charities are offering gift cards, or "Buy an Acre" or "Adopt a Wildlife" Certificates. World Vision has a program for sponsoring families or entire communities with the resources to start their own businesses. Locally, Madrona Farms, Save Mary Lake, David Suzuki Foundation, and assorted others are offering Gift Ideas this season. Canada Gives lets you buy a charitable gift card, that the recipient decides who to donate it to.
9) Don't pass on recycling: During the holiday season, it seems a lot easier to trash things, than rinse/fold/break down and recycle them. At this highly consumer-driven time of year, it is especially important to keep as much waste from the landfill as we can.
Hope you have a very special holiday season!
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
Surviving Christmas: Keeping the Peace and Acknoledging those who do it every day.
At this time of year, it can be hard to remember why we are doing all of this. I look at the calendar, and realize that in 16 days, it will all be over for another year, but not before some good times, and some tough times, with our families.
I work as a behaviour consultant and interventionist for children and youth affected by developmental disabilities. The families I work with, are often under tremendous stress at this time of year, in anticipation of having to bring their child to all sorts of get-togethers and shin-digs, at which the child will be expected to be on it's best behaviour. Well, best behaviour for your child, and best behaviour for a child with FASD or Autism, are two entirely different things.
I grew up with a younger sister affected by autism. She is now an adult, and thriving, but for many, many, many years, it was a challenge to survive the holidays. I remember when she was just 2 or 3, and we would set up the Christmas tree, and then over the course of the season, the tinsel would fall off the tree and onto the carpet. When the tinsel got stuck to her feet and hands, she would go crazy, scream and cry, until someone took it off of her.
As she got older, we realized how important rituals and traditions are to people with different brains. She is the one who keeps track of our family traditions, and makes sure we repeat them every year. Whether it is reading "The Night Before Christmas" together as a family on Christmas Eve, or cooking the Christmas Breakfast, it all has to be done the way it was done last year, and all the years before that.
Now, if you were to try to change the traditions, that would be a problem. If we were to try to go out of town for Christmas, she might not survive the anxiety. One year my mom brought home a new book, to read together on Christmas Eve. After surviving its trip out the window, I believe it is still in it's package.
For some people, this rigidity is uncomfortable. Even for me. Is it really such a big deal if we have sausages instead of bacon for breaky? Once in a while, I would like to switch up the routine. But then I remember the effect this will have on my whole family, and especially my sister. So we let her run the show, and she does a good job, and we all enjoy our holidays together.
The biggest challenge in working with people with developmental disabilities, can be convincing other people that it is not the child that needs to change, but the environment. When the environment is accepting and understanding of the cognitive differences, everyone will have a better time.
This Holiday Season, while enjoying time with your family, appreciate their flexibility, or lack thereof. Each person brings their own unique gifts, and if this person's gift is that of Tradition, then so be it. If your gift is flexibility, then be flexible, and adapt yourself to make someone elses holiday a little easier.
There are a few tips and tricks I have for surviving holidays with family, any family, but especially those who are affected by brain-differences.
1) Don't get stuck at the shopping centre on Christmas Eve. Be prepared, and have your shopping done before the last minute, or have someone like a friend or family member help you out. Dragging your kids through packed malls and parking lots is asking for a meltdown.
2) Skip on Sugar: At the tip of my stocking every year, is a mandarin orange. When I was a kid, the orange was the only thing we were allowed to eat before breakfast, and had to save the candy for later. When kids are already exhausted from staying up late, and getting up early, a morning sugar dose, is just asking for a 1:00pm meltdown. Sugarless Stuffers: magnets, brain-teaser games, stickers, stuffed animals, fruit, dried fruit, nuts and seeds, gift cards, chips or salty snacks, crayons/art supplies, photo albums (if already filled by parents, can occupy a lot of time looking through at all the faces and places.)
3)Take a breakfast break. Getting caught up in stockings, Santa presents, and then family presents on the morning of the 25th can be an effort for any of us, let alone for a child who's brain works differently. Be sure to take a break, get some good food in their bellies. This will help balance out the inevitable sugar, and keep everyone sane.
4) Take an exercise break. A wise, wise woman I know, calls this a 'transition activity,' an in-between task that gets kids who have difficulty changing modalities, ready for the next task or activity. For example, after the kids have breakfast, send them out to the back yard to see if the Reindeer ate the carrots. When they run back in, dad-chewed-carrots in hand, they will be out of breath, and ready for the next gift. In Victoria, we are usually blessed with Green Christmases, and can go outside in our jammies, even in December. When presents are done, have a family game of soccer, or xbox Kinect. If you have a dog, take him/her for a walk together, the dog will appreciate the break from the madness, and it will give the whole family a chance to get some fresh air and talk about whats going on outside.
5) Let it go. Christmas is tough. It's tough for parents, and its tough for kids. And its supposed to be all candy-canes and sleighbells. I know. The truth of the matter, is that we are all at the end of our ropes, and even the most wonderful parents and kids will make mistakes. Cut them some slack. No one wants to fight.
6) Don't give a dirty look to the woman who's child is struggling at the grocery line-up. Developmental disabilities are usually invisible, meaning the child may look like an average child, but have a completely different brain. You don't know what they have been through today, let alone this month. I know a parent who is at her wits end because her son was kicked out of preschool for being non-compliant. PRESCHOOL. Can you imagine the burden she holds? Can you imaging holding that burden, AND being given dirty look every where you go, because your son can't handle being in a high-stress, environment?
This holiday season, if you know someone who is a caregiver of a child who is "better than average," take a minute to appreciate them. Parents of kids affected by FASD and Autism are some of the most amazing, wonderful people I know, and are definitely the ones who are recognized the least. Even just a phone call, to say thanks for being you, can make the day of a parent who is otherwise struggling. If you have time, offer to take them for a coffee, or a play date. If time is limited, send a card, that tells them you admire all their hard work. It takes a special person to be a parent to these kids, and we need to tell them how much we appreciate the work they put in.
The kindest words, I ever heard from a stranger, were "Look at the smiles on those kids faces, they look so proud." Simple, yet so powerful.
I work as a behaviour consultant and interventionist for children and youth affected by developmental disabilities. The families I work with, are often under tremendous stress at this time of year, in anticipation of having to bring their child to all sorts of get-togethers and shin-digs, at which the child will be expected to be on it's best behaviour. Well, best behaviour for your child, and best behaviour for a child with FASD or Autism, are two entirely different things.
I grew up with a younger sister affected by autism. She is now an adult, and thriving, but for many, many, many years, it was a challenge to survive the holidays. I remember when she was just 2 or 3, and we would set up the Christmas tree, and then over the course of the season, the tinsel would fall off the tree and onto the carpet. When the tinsel got stuck to her feet and hands, she would go crazy, scream and cry, until someone took it off of her.
As she got older, we realized how important rituals and traditions are to people with different brains. She is the one who keeps track of our family traditions, and makes sure we repeat them every year. Whether it is reading "The Night Before Christmas" together as a family on Christmas Eve, or cooking the Christmas Breakfast, it all has to be done the way it was done last year, and all the years before that.
Now, if you were to try to change the traditions, that would be a problem. If we were to try to go out of town for Christmas, she might not survive the anxiety. One year my mom brought home a new book, to read together on Christmas Eve. After surviving its trip out the window, I believe it is still in it's package.
For some people, this rigidity is uncomfortable. Even for me. Is it really such a big deal if we have sausages instead of bacon for breaky? Once in a while, I would like to switch up the routine. But then I remember the effect this will have on my whole family, and especially my sister. So we let her run the show, and she does a good job, and we all enjoy our holidays together.
The biggest challenge in working with people with developmental disabilities, can be convincing other people that it is not the child that needs to change, but the environment. When the environment is accepting and understanding of the cognitive differences, everyone will have a better time.
This Holiday Season, while enjoying time with your family, appreciate their flexibility, or lack thereof. Each person brings their own unique gifts, and if this person's gift is that of Tradition, then so be it. If your gift is flexibility, then be flexible, and adapt yourself to make someone elses holiday a little easier.
There are a few tips and tricks I have for surviving holidays with family, any family, but especially those who are affected by brain-differences.
1) Don't get stuck at the shopping centre on Christmas Eve. Be prepared, and have your shopping done before the last minute, or have someone like a friend or family member help you out. Dragging your kids through packed malls and parking lots is asking for a meltdown.
2) Skip on Sugar: At the tip of my stocking every year, is a mandarin orange. When I was a kid, the orange was the only thing we were allowed to eat before breakfast, and had to save the candy for later. When kids are already exhausted from staying up late, and getting up early, a morning sugar dose, is just asking for a 1:00pm meltdown. Sugarless Stuffers: magnets, brain-teaser games, stickers, stuffed animals, fruit, dried fruit, nuts and seeds, gift cards, chips or salty snacks, crayons/art supplies, photo albums (if already filled by parents, can occupy a lot of time looking through at all the faces and places.)
3)Take a breakfast break. Getting caught up in stockings, Santa presents, and then family presents on the morning of the 25th can be an effort for any of us, let alone for a child who's brain works differently. Be sure to take a break, get some good food in their bellies. This will help balance out the inevitable sugar, and keep everyone sane.
4) Take an exercise break. A wise, wise woman I know, calls this a 'transition activity,' an in-between task that gets kids who have difficulty changing modalities, ready for the next task or activity. For example, after the kids have breakfast, send them out to the back yard to see if the Reindeer ate the carrots. When they run back in, dad-chewed-carrots in hand, they will be out of breath, and ready for the next gift. In Victoria, we are usually blessed with Green Christmases, and can go outside in our jammies, even in December. When presents are done, have a family game of soccer, or xbox Kinect. If you have a dog, take him/her for a walk together, the dog will appreciate the break from the madness, and it will give the whole family a chance to get some fresh air and talk about whats going on outside.
5) Let it go. Christmas is tough. It's tough for parents, and its tough for kids. And its supposed to be all candy-canes and sleighbells. I know. The truth of the matter, is that we are all at the end of our ropes, and even the most wonderful parents and kids will make mistakes. Cut them some slack. No one wants to fight.
6) Don't give a dirty look to the woman who's child is struggling at the grocery line-up. Developmental disabilities are usually invisible, meaning the child may look like an average child, but have a completely different brain. You don't know what they have been through today, let alone this month. I know a parent who is at her wits end because her son was kicked out of preschool for being non-compliant. PRESCHOOL. Can you imagine the burden she holds? Can you imaging holding that burden, AND being given dirty look every where you go, because your son can't handle being in a high-stress, environment?
This holiday season, if you know someone who is a caregiver of a child who is "better than average," take a minute to appreciate them. Parents of kids affected by FASD and Autism are some of the most amazing, wonderful people I know, and are definitely the ones who are recognized the least. Even just a phone call, to say thanks for being you, can make the day of a parent who is otherwise struggling. If you have time, offer to take them for a coffee, or a play date. If time is limited, send a card, that tells them you admire all their hard work. It takes a special person to be a parent to these kids, and we need to tell them how much we appreciate the work they put in.
The kindest words, I ever heard from a stranger, were "Look at the smiles on those kids faces, they look so proud." Simple, yet so powerful.
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